Step One: You don’t.
That’s pretty much it.
You don’t stop loving him.
Why would you want to?
He loved you, gave joy to you, shared life and living with you.
He shared a home with you, a bed with you, intimacy’s embrace with you.
He shared fears, and tears, and years with you
Of course you did love him, still love him and will love him
But not everything good to you is good for you.
Perhaps it was the addiction
Perhaps it was the predilection for indulgences contrary to dedication to relations singular and fidelitous
Perhaps it was bad credit, bad debits, bad story edits
Perhaps it was the beatings
Nevertheless whatever distress brought about the duress that led to the best thing you thought you would ever have becoming the worse thing you ever went through, the “we” and the “us” you came to trust broke and left you alone.
How do you stop loving the wrong man?
But you can stop blaming him and shaming him and naming him the cause of all despair.
You can let him go.
It will pain you, bleed you from tiny wounds and kill a piece of your soul.
For you see
Love has a price.
Love feeds on sacrifice
Love lives in hell as well as paradise.
And love will take you there.
But the price can be paid and the misery laid to rest, not dead but sleeping.
And that’s enough
So no, you can’t stop loving him, but you can let go his pain and give it back to him.
Let it go, let it go back to him
And then mourn pain’s passing
Step out into an awakening day
And be free.